ok so first im listening to gotham city by R kelly. it kinda made me think that that song is kinda true. deff one of my favs even though its mad old haha... most of my favs are old haha.
its bassically like::::.......
"A city of justice, a city of love
A city of peace, for everyone of us
We all need it, can't live without it"

im pretty sure its based on batman haha but W/E its R kelly. like its true cuz people like so much shits going on in this world and if there really were superheros it would be wayy better, just to get the bad guys trying to hurt people and stuff like that. not people smoking pot psh then everyone would be in jail.

like evryone keeps getting in harms way. too many people think theyr tough guys cuz they own a gun.. but take the gun away and theyr nothing. just scared.
parents are scared to let theyr kids play in the park cuz people keep getting killed. like i used to chill there but now i realize why chil in a park... let the lil kids who acually wanna use the slide hangout there. they could chill at madison park high in the parking lot but instead choose to go2 there.

im done with that topic cuz i jst cant go on now thinking about that and what happend there.



2. school stats up soon i found out its not on the 6th i got a letter with my chedule and stuff yesterday. it starts the 9th fo the freshmen... ahh i dont wanna be a freshie.. i just wanna finish school.. Im going to NQHS and i honestly dont bcuz of my reputation. when i was sick people thought i was in rehab, pregnant again or jail. i got back to school and there was all these rumors and i was out of the "in crowd" or my history teacher called us a "crew" . so going back to school with the same people.. im straight up scared outa my mind. at times im like i dont care i can just goto school and go home or goto braintree. but thats not me. i care what people think of me... its how my mom raised me.. i know its wrong but its drilled into my mind now.

Im probably gonna try to join a club that im interested in and probly meet some new friends. ive never been on the outside before. and now i am. it sucks. im scared im not gonna meet anyone to be friends with now that ive lost the ones from quincy. allong with that i dont get good grades so its not like i can be the smart girl. im afraid im gonna be that girl in the school with no friends at school and not even smart so the teachers like me. yeah i have friends from my old towns but now here its different. ugh so ima see what happens.

haha that made me think or roumors by wayne wonder... another awsome song haha


3. It will be 3months with Riley on the 4th im so happy.. i think im in love for realzies if shes the one thats awsome because no more heartbrakes or goofing off with pointless relationships. and honestly if shes not the one id be heartbroken and would have to go back with guys. i dont think id wanna date another girl other her. but anyways i think she is the one




4.. im going to maine to party it up!!!! . my aunt kathy and uncle brian live up there with some of my cuzins. they live on a lake so the neighbors are in a circle on the lake but other than that the rest are like miles apart haha... i concider it the middle of nowhere being im a city girl haha. but i have 3 friends up there i can party with at nght its pretty kewl. since they have nothing better to do they just party. theres not realy a mall they can goto. evfen the closest stop and shop is like 2 miles away..... around here if we drive somewhere and start to see nothing i freak out and think were lost.

so i CANT WAIT!!!!




5. as for me quiting smoking didnt really work so i was like freaking out at my uncle how i cant live with my dad and not smoke. so he started talking about herbal cigerettes. they have no nicotine or tabacco in them so its healthier, and he explained how the reason why smoking calms me down is besause you breath slowly wich is how you breath when your sleeping and theats when your the most relaxed. so smoking anything calms you down. then i realized hes right im not even addicted to the nicotine thats why its been hard for me to stop with patched and gum. its jsut smoking anything to calm down bcuz or how i breath.

so im not gonna die early! its a healthier way to smoke!!!!! hahaha



i love you riley!!!!